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I was 12, when I decided that I wanted to try smoking. It was a Winston that I stole from my mom when she wasn't around. I didn't really like it but, after several more attempts over a couple of weeks, I realized that I was supposed to inhale it into my lungs. Once I figured that out by watching my parents and their friends smoking, I tried it again. It was so incredible that all I could think about was doing it again. When I decided to buy my first pack, I couldn't make up my mind on what brand to get, so I opened up a magazine and saw an old ad for Vantage cigarettes. I don't know if anyone else remembers it, but it had pictures of like 20 or 30 different brands of cigarettes on it. So, I tore out the ad, tacked it to my dartboard, and threw a dart at it. It landed on Kools, so that's what I bought. I didn't really care for them, so the next time I tried again. Over the next several months, I must have tried almost every brand on that ad. Some were great, and some were pretty nasty, but I've been smoking ever since then.

I was only ten years old when I smoked my first cigarette, but it's one of the clearest memories I have from around that time in my life. My grandparents smoked a lot, all the time, and I spent a lot of time at their house as a kid. I realized that I was starting to like the smell of their smoke, and sometimes my grandmother would leave a burning cigarette in an ash and go into another room, so I started to hold the unattended cigarette, but I never took a drag. Sometimes I would breathe the smoke in that was coming off the burning tip, but I never actually put the filter to my mouth and took a drag. Then one day, I decided that I had to try it, so I stole a cigarette from my grandmother's pack and I stole a lighter. It was around April, a few months after I turned ten. I waited till dark, and on my way home from my grandparents (my parents lived beside them) I snuck into the woods behind my parents house and I lit my first one. I remember having problems getting it lit, because I didn't really know how to inhale, as silly as that sounds, but once I did my ever real drag on cigarette was long and deep, I filled my little ten year lungs. I even held the smoke of that first drag in for at least a few seconds. I almost felt like I was going to cough, but then I slowly exhaled, and never coughed in the slightest. I guess my lungs were kind of use to it from the second smoke exposure of my grandparents house. I remember thinking that the feeling of the smoke was so amazing. Going down my throat, being inside my lungs, it was like nothing I had ever experienced. I remember the feeling of the nicotine going to my head, and it was amazing, this sense of calmness came over my whole body. When I think back to it, I belive I was addicted from the very first drag, because after lighting that first cigarette there was no going back. The second drag was just as amazing, I think the third is when the horrible head rush really kicked in and I had to sit down on the cold ground to finish the cigarette, but I did finish it, I smoked down to the very end of the filter. By this time my vision almost seemed distorted. I remember stumbling out of the woods feeling like I was going to fall over. When I got inside I went straight to bed and told my mom I was feeling sick. She never questioned the smokey smell I must have had all over me because I had came from my grandparents so she thought. I remember laying in bed and almost feeling sick, but at the same time I remembered how incredible the first few drags felt, and I couldn't stop thinking about cigarettes all night. The next day I had to have another one, I remember that cigarettes were all I thought about all day in school, in only the fourth grade. That night I repeated the process, stealing another, and I had kept the lighter from the night before. The second cigarette was equally as amazing, and this time I didn't feel quite so out of it. The next day and the next I kept stealing one more cigarette. That quickly turned into stealing two at a time, and smoking every chance I could get, and planning out how I would have my next smoke, or steal my next, until I eventually ended up stealing whole packs from my grandparents' cartons and realizing that they smoked so much that they really never kept track. I never stopped from that day onwards, and I think the last smoke free day that I ever had in my life was when I was 12. I remember that was a very bad day. 18 years after my first cigarette, I'm a very heavy chain smoker, and I don't regret it at all. I am completely in love and obessed with my cigarettes and my addiction.